We're not confronting children: California restaurant owner warns parents who don't do their jobs will pay if kids break things — down to the cent

Americans are fed up with misbehaving children in restaurants. In fact, 75% of consumers (1) have expressed support for some kind of adults-only dining. And that includes nearly 80% of parents.

It’s not just diners who are tired of loud kids ruining their dinners, either. Some restaurant owners have also become frustrated with unruly children who cause a disruption and even break expensive equipment.

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You You Xue is one of those restaurant owners. And according to Today (2), Xue decided to do something about the issue. Here’s what he’s doing and whether his approach is likely to work.

Bay Area restaurant owner warns that misbehavior has consequences

Xue took a firm stance against bad behavior in his restaurant, which took the form of adding a note to his online menu (3). It reads:

“Please control your children. Chez Xue is a family-friendly restaurant. However, we are not a playground. Please ensure children REMAIN SEATED at all times and respectful of fellow guests and the dining environment. Running around, shouting, making noise with utensils, etc. WILL NOT BE TOLERATED!”

The warning went viral after it was posted on X (4), and, perhaps unsurprisingly, the vast majority of commenters sided with Xue, with one commenter summing up the consensus very well, stating, “Too many parents believe ‘kids will be kids’ entitles their kids to be obnoxious and destructive.”

For his part, Xue also explained how he enforces his strict rules against unruly children.

“My servers are all trained to take the appropriate action to protect the restaurant environment,” he told Today.

He also explained that this action doesn’t involve dealing with the kids directly, nor does it include interfering with parents who are trying to deal with misbehavior. His problem is with parents who don’t pay attention or don’t act to stop their kids.

“We’re not confronting children at the restaurant about their behavior,” Xue said, “We’re not banning children. We’re not discriminating against children.”

He just expects the kids to behave.

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There’s a real financial cost for misbehavior

As controversial as posting the warning online was, Xue also admitted to taking an even more drastic step to curb the chaos caused by kids who don’t behave. He’s charging parents directly for the physical damage their kids cause. And his website included a list of fees he’s already imposed, including:

• $327.03 for a credit card machine that a child shattered
• $109.38 after a child carved a table
• $5.47 when a child broke a teacup.

“We’re not in the business of making people break things and buy them,” Xue told Today. “But anything that breaks comes straight out of my pocket… We want to show customers who might have doubts about our policy that we mean business.”

Is Xue’s approach effective?

Xue’s methods appear to be working for him, as he explained the number of issues had “just basically gone to zero” after implementing the changes.

However, it’s worth noting that Xue’s policy is essentially a “You Break It, You Buy It” policy, which is common in stores, but which actually isn’t very easy to enforce (5).

While Xue might be able to sue if parents negligently allow their kids to cause damages that lead to him losing money, pursuing legal action usually wouldn’t make sense over a teacup or any other small loss. He’d also have to prove the parents are to blame and show the extent of his harm.

Unfortunately, Xue’s policy could also cause other problems for him. The rules could limit Xue’s customer base, as 24% of all restaurant traffic (6) comes from families with kids 12 and under.

Of course, hopefully there are enough parents with well-behaved kids that the restaurant can still fill its seats and do good business.

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Article Sources

We rely only on vetted sources and credible third-party reporting. For details, see our ethics and guidelines.

Lightspeed (1); Today (2); Chez Xue (3); X (4); FindLaw (5); C3 Brand Marketing (6)

This article provides information only and should not be construed as advice. It is provided without warranty of any kind.