How to successfully deal with a micromanaging boss

I’ve worked for many, and I know the distinct frustration of being pinged with, “Just checking in!” less than an hour after being asked how something is “coming along.”

Even when I know I’m delivering at a high level, being asked for constant updates on my progress can feel demoralizing.

It can be hard not to let a micromanager chip away at your confidence. A whopping 64% of workers who feel micromanaged at work also report feeling tense or stressed — while only 36% of workers who don’t feel micromanaged say the same, according to a 2023 survey by the American Psychological Association. And micromanagers were found to rank as the second most annoying types of people to work with, just behind colleagues who steal credit for others’ work, according to a 2024 Kickresume survey of 3,000 workers.

Here’s how I learned to stop taking it personally — along with tips I’ve picked up for working in harmony with a manager you find annoying.  

— Aditi Shrikant

Career move of the week: How to deal with your micromanaging boss

There is an avalanche of advice on TikTok about how to deal with a micromanager, and videos with the #micromanager tag have 230.2 million views and counting. One tactic that’s gained traction advises you to micromanage your micromanager. That’s a passive-aggressive approach that looks like this: sending the boss updates every 30 minutes, asking questions you already know the answer to and emailing summaries of every minor meeting or interaction. 

But don’t do this, says Henna Pryor, a workplace-performance expert and executive coach. You’ll just end up annoying your manager or cultivating a combative relationship. “The goal isn’t to out-control your controller,” she says. “That’s a battle no one wants to fight.”

Plus, this excruciating level of oversight likely isn’t personal, says Tessa West, a psychology professor at New York University and the author of “Jerks at Work: Toxic Coworkers and What to Do About Them.”

‘The goal isn’t to out-control your controller. That’s a battle no one wants to fight.’ — Henna Pryor, workplace-performance expert and executive coach

Put yourself in their shoes: Completing a task as a worker is very different from overseeing the completion of a task as a manager, which is why excellent employees often take a few years to become excellent managers. Your boss is likely being given benchmarks by their own higher-ups and may not yet have the confidence or training required to skillfully delegate.

“Nine out of 10 times [micromanaging] has nothing to do with trust or the person,” says West. “It could be because they are insecure about their own performance.”

A poll of MarketWatch followers on X found that 75% have worked for a micromanager, with one commenter saying: “They say they hate micromanagers yet aren’t self-aware to realize they are a micromanager.”

So instead of taking it personally, take steps to understand your boss’s anxieties and get ahead of them. Here’s the professional way to manage a micromanager.

Learn from what your colleagues are doing

When I was 22, my boss told me, “You never really update me on what you’re doing.” Panicked, I responded with a barrage of questions: Are you unsatisfied with my work? Do you want me to do more? Do you feel like I’m not doing enough? 

I consulted a co-worker about why I was being asked to check in more. My colleague responded in shock: “You never check in with her? I email her every morning and tell her what I’m doing.” 

I had no idea everyone else on our team was offering our manager updates once or twice a day — meanwhile, I was checking in with her once a week. 

To figure out whether your boss’s behavior is in line with your company’s culture, do what I didn’t: Ask your co-workers how their projects are being overseen. How frequently does your manager like being updated? Do they prefer email or a quick phone call? Sometimes what we perceive as micromanagement is just workplace culture.

“Go to people who are successful at work, who held your role before or currently, and say, ‘This is the type of treatment I’m getting from my boss. Is this normative?’” West says. 

It’s likely that you’re not being singled out for poor performance. This is just your boss’s preferred communication style.

Make a plan with your manager

Set a meeting with your manager to talk about goals, and then outline what would be helpful for you to accomplish them. 

Don’t bring up any overbearing behavior like, “You message me too much,” as they will probably get defensive. Instead, think of what would help you reach your goals more efficiently. Rather than saying something like, “I think it’s a waste of time to ask for your approval to execute the smallest tasks,” say, “I’d love it if we wrote down clear guidelines together about what you expect from me when it comes to completing this project.” This way, you’re improving the process, not criticizing it.

After all, you both want the same thing in the end. “Micromanagement is a time suck for micromanagers,” West says. “They get nothing done but are working all the time.” So by coming to them with a plan of action, you are hopefully addressing some of their anxiety, and also communicating that you want to make their life easier.

In my case, after my manager said that she wanted more clarity about what I was working on, I asked her if sending a short, bullet-pointed list each morning about how close each task was to being done would work. I made sure to be specific about what I was going to email her so she could set her expectations appropriately.

Stick to the plan

The goal-setting meeting is just the beginning. You have to actually execute what you proposed. So if you agreed to send notes after every meeting, make sure you’re sending a detailed outline of what you both talked about in a timely manner.

For me, this meant committing to sending a regular morning email in which I reported on the status of each news article that I had in the works. It created about 15 minutes of work for me a day, but the jump-scare messages from my boss did stop as she felt more in the loop, so I considered that a win.

Uncertainty is a micromanager’s biggest fear, Pryor says. So the fewer things they have to be anxious about, the better.

“Being consistently, predictably reliable is one of the most underrated forms of workplace influence,” she says. “Trust is built in the boring moments like the on-time update and the no-surprises heads-up.”

But also know when it’s time to look for another job

Inconsistency is common in micromanagers, West says, meaning they often move the goalposts. So even if you send more regular updates, complete tasks by the exact deadline and keep your boss in the loop about how far along you are on certain projects, it still might not help.

If you are genuinely attempting to reduce your boss’s anxiety but don’t feel like your relationship is improving, it might be time to move on. Almost half of workers (46%) in a 2023 Monster.com survey said they’d leave a job because of a micromanager, with three in four saying micromanagement raised the biggest red flag about that particular workplace.

Even after I started paying more attention to what made my micromanaging boss anxious, she was still exhausting. She wasn’t the reason I left that job. But once I moved to another company, I was able to spend more time actually doing the work, as opposed to repetitively communicating about it, which has been much better for my career and my sanity. But if I hadn’t made those moves and tried to meet her halfway, I do believe our relationship would have suffered, and I wouldn’t have been able to leave on good terms.

The bottom line: You don’t want to burn bridges at work. And I’m happy to say that this particular manager was one of my professional references for years afterward.

And now for an exciting Don’t Short Yourself update from MarketWatch’s Genna Contino

I’m Genna Contino, MarketWatch’s Smart Spending reporter. You might recognize my name from previous newsletters and stories, but starting Aug. 4 I’ll be in your inbox every Tuesday as I officially take the reins as Don’t Short Yourself’s regular writer. This free newsletter will keep delivering simple yet actionable tips to help you grow your wealth and spend your money wisely. And I’ll continue to spill my money-related wins and regrets as I navigate my own financial journey.

I have some exciting editions planned, but I also want to hear from you: What money matters are vexing you? Is there a financial skill you think you should have developed by now, but are too embarrassed to ask about? Email me at [email protected] to let me know what you want to see covered. I want this to be a safe and judgment-free space where we can be vulnerable and earnest as we figure out our finances together.

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